Ken Ham And His New ‘Museum’ Manage To Create Nothing But Failure On The Taxpayer’s Dime

Ken Ham had a vision, possibly one that he felt was given to him by God. Like Noah, he had the vision to build an ark. This was different than the first time, though. This new ark was built not to save animals, but in the name of good old American Capitalism, because good old Ken needed money.

Ken decided that he would build a Noah’s Ark-themed amusement park where he could educate America on how the world is only 6000 years old and people lived along side dinosaurs. Ken promised the state of Kentucky this would be wildly successful. He personally projected upwards of 2 million visitors in the first year alone.

This is how he convinced Kentucky to fork over $18 million in taxpayer money to subsidize his project. After a lot of resistance by the people of Kentucky, their elected leaders opted to hand over the money anyway because of the promises of success they were given.

As you’ll see below, things didn’t quite work the way they expected.

The Friendly Atheist attended the opening day and provided some pictures and video of the crowds. That’s the joke. There were no crowds.

Count the Christians in the video below:

Just look at all those Christians lining up to learn the “answers in genesis.” I think I saw 5 total. Our intrepid investigator also took us to what surely would be the most popular place in the park – the petting zoo.

Well, technically there were more people there but it was hardly a crowd of any kind. It certainly was nothing like you’d expect in even a modestly successful amusement park. It’s probably because the petting “zoo” was more like 1 pen with a few goats in it. The rest of the zoo area consisted of empty cages and mounds of dirt. Even one of the security guards told her not to bother, because the petting zoo was pathetic.

Here’s a video of the emptiest zoo that still charges people money to enter it:

Remember that this theme park cost about 70 million dollars so far, 18 of which was taken from Kentucky taxpayers and handed over to the park to promote its religious agenda. So far it has only proven that Ken Ham can’t get people to take him seriously, even if he spends 70 million bucks to make it happen.

The Friendly Atheist also walked around the interior of the ark, which closely resembled the lumber section at the local Home Depot. To call it redundant would be a bit of an understatement. I guess they call it “historically accurate” but when it comes to an amusement park you’d think that an exhibit would at least try to look appealing.

Note the vast open hallways, almost completely empty of people again:

Here’s another picture showing the huge crowds that attended the opening.


And don’t forget the cages full of dinosaurs, because that totally happened:


Could this be a hiccup, and could the park become wildly successful once it’s actually finished? Possibly. Do you really think they can fluff up this place enough to make it a destination that people would want to repeatedly come to with their family and/or friends to have a good time? Not very likely. Will it become commercially viable, and repay the 18 million dollars that it stole from the residents of Kentucky? Not a chance in hell.

Kentucky deserves a refund.

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  • Mike

    Total blasphemy! Everyone knows that everything was created by the Flying Spaghetti Monster four thousand years ago when he made a mountan, trees, and a midgit.

    • Cory Meters

      Ramen brother Mike, Ramen to that! Hear our prayers FSM! And don’t forget pirates!

  • MJD

    Our governor steals from us in different ways. I’d say I feel sorry for Kentuckians, but anyone with a GOP government needs our sympathy.

  • Richard Doell

    Funny they didn’t actually put millions of animals on the ark and try and take care of them for one day let alone as long as in the biblical accounts. Projections for the total number of species on Earth range from 2 million to 50 million. Believe it or not, there are about 950,000 species of insects. Let Ken Ham take care of all of them for just one day with the water and food supplies alone. in the bible after it rained that 40 days and nights, the waters prevailed on the earth for another 150 days [5 months]. A pangolin will consume an average of 140 to 200 g (4.9 to 7.1 oz) of insects per day.I suppose Ken Ham laid in a supply of ants as well. The food chain consists of other animals eating each other. What did the predators eat for 190 days?

    This place is a monument to human stupidity!

    • Wesley Mahan

      I’ve seen the apologists answer to that one: basically God put them all in a type of coma so they didn’t have to eat (and supposedly wouldn’t have to poop either!).

      • GOPocalypse Admin

        Of course! lol!

  • Zing

    I think this is a crock of sht too, but to be fair to Kentucky, no one wrote an $18 mil check. That aid is in the form of forgiven taxes on future revenues. (In other words, it will cost, but it is a future cost rather than a present one.) OTOH, the city of Williamstown floated a $62 mil bond issue, and gave Ham other perks wirh their eyes on future development around the park that their investors might come to regret.

  • Steven

    Of course they couldn’t keep live animals in those small cages, it would have been inhumane, and gotten them shut down. Now consider keeping all those animals that were supposed kept in there, in those cages for over a year. How many do you think would be in any shape to mate and continue their species once they got out? Not to mention their lack of sufficient food stores.

  • A couple more thoughts about the possibility of the Flood being a real event:
    According to Bible chronology the flood would have had to have taken place approximately 2300 BC
    1. The China, India and other civilizations have long written histories and never seemed to notice that they’d all been killed in a flood
    2. “Otzi” The “Iceman” was found frozen and dates to 5300 years old, had he been underwater he would have thawed and long since decayed.
    3. The pyramids of Egypt were being built during the time frame the flood was supposed to be happening and all the tombs found in Egypt have zero evidence of ever having been underwater (tombs filled with sand, mummies ruined from water damage or other indications)
    4. Coral reefs are much older than the flood and very sensitive to their water conditions, a massive infusion of fresh water would have devastated all coral reefs worldwide.
    5. Have you ever wondered how animals like tree sloths who only move a few feet each day could make it to the middle east to get on this ark…and then get back to South America and nowhere else?
    I only mention a few of the absurd things one would need to accept in order to believe the Noah’s Ark fairy tale.
    The flood story should be an insult to your intelligence……unless you’re into “intellectual suicide”

  • Pamela

    My feelings about the park aside, I believe there aren’t any crowds because this was a media and vip preview. Unless this is a different day?

  • Frank Fazekas

    So I think you just proved that, especially without power tools and cranes and bulldozers, a really old man and his two sons could never, Never, NEVER, NEV-VVVR have built the ark 🙂

    Basically Ken Ham is one of the all-time scam artists and he’s probably sitting under an umbrella on his Caribbean island sipping on a fruity cocktail right now.